|Going into the Darkness|
Honestly, I kind of envy the kind of dark spirituality found in the blogs I linked to. I love reading about the poisoner’s path filled with bones and deadly herbs or the mystic’s solitary existence where the deepest connection they have is with the Gods and Spirits. However, I’ve consistently found that instead of diving into the depths I’ve flown to the heights. Rainbows and sunshine are my omens. The Dawn guides me to a path devoted to creativity, beauty, and healing.
Sometimes I feel like a pagan goodie-goodie dork.
That’s not to say that I don’t have some solid weirdo cred, but in the main, my spirituality is a bright and shining thing. There’s power within that as well, in case you’re wondering. I’ve shared some amazing experiences. Sometimes I wonder if the reason that so many pagans are attracted to the darker paths is because those who tend toward sunshiny spirituality stay in Christian faiths. It’s much easier to fit your spirituality into a Christian matrix when you express your spirituality in symbols of light, love, and healing. I’m not a Christian though. I am deeply committed to my Gods and Goddesses, to my Ancestors, to the Spirits of the Land. I expect my religion to not only make my life better, but help me interact with the larger community in a positive way, and I’m not convinced that Christian theology can ever truly provide that. More than that, my Gods are not their Gods. I have my own deep and abiding faith, and I’m good with that.
Nor is it that I’m naturally a happy-go-lucky person. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety for a long, long time now, and it’s taken me years of work to get to the stable place I am now. I was attracted to darker paths, but that’s not where I’ve ended up. I think part of it is my children. I am dedicated to providing them with an atmosphere of learning and positivity and as a stay at home mom it is never far from my thoughts.
|It can be a long climb out of depression.|
Maybe a world like that needs a little sunshine and rainbows.